Fake News: Florida Man Tries To Turn Gaming Obsession Into Career

“DING! Achievement Unlocked!” Marshall exclaimed, instead of answering our question. He barely looked up from his gaming monitor and kept excitedly typing on his brand new Razr Keyboard. His desk was covered in candy bar wrappers, empty bags of Hot Cheetos and half-empty bottles of what we assume is Mountain Dew.

Marshall Brown (32) of Pensacola Florida became a Trillionaire (in game) yesterday after a long gaming session of Grand Theft Auto:V, Counter-Strike: Global Offensive and several other video games, First Person Shooters and Role Playing Games, such as “Skyrim and World of Warcraft.”

“It took a lot of hard work, but it’s finally paid off. Now I can quit the grind and finally start enjoying my life online,” said Mr. Brown.

We visited Mr. Brown yesterday at his small one bedroom apartment in downtown Pensacola. He was casually reclining in his custom gaming computer chair next to a computer he had built himself, presumably to aid in his journey to fortune and fame.

“Oh this? Yeah it cost about $800, but that’s nothing for a high-roller like me. I’m currently working on how to transfer all this money that I’ve earned across several games into one bank account so I can start paying some bills. I have student loans piling up.”

Marshall has been out of work for the last month, and instead of looking for a new job, he’s been online nearly every waking moment trying to “beat every last game that’s been piling up.”

“It’s been driving me nuts, stupid job kept getting in the way of my play time. It’s nice to not have to punch in and wear a nametag for at least a little while.”

Marshall, who goes by the gamertag “xXx_yolo_swaggins_420_get$_xXx” has been playing video games since he was fired from his job at a local grocery store for being caught stealing Cheetos during his lunch break.

“That job was stupid anyway, I’m gonna be a famous Youtuber! Then they’ll be sorry they fired me!”

In between headshots and running pedestrians over with a stolen police car, Marhsall will occasionally look at a second monitor he’s set up to make sure that the camera gets a good angle of his face while he streams Grand Theft Auto: V and makes snarky comments to his viewers on Twitch.

Marshall hasn’t showered in five days, and sleeps at his desk. He’s dedicated to getting his Streaming Career off the ground, and we wish him the best of luck. He asks that you like, subscribe and follow him across several gaming platforms.